marchipelago 30.01, 41 a.b.
Vladimir Putin was elected president of Russia last Sunday.
I've been thinking that I really ought to send him a card or
I mean, I send cards to friends and relatives all the time,
and they don't have thousands of nuclear warheads at their
Most don't even have a single machine gun....
Then it occurred to me: Maybe I'm Vladimir Putin.
He's now in charge of a land of 6,592,800 square miles.
I have to mow 3/4 of an acre once a week for 7 months of the year.
He's responsible for the lives of some 147,000,000 people.
I have a cat.
He has four years to get things done.
I don't have an endless amount of time to eat, shower, make my
bed, and read the paper myself.
The kicker - the thing that really made me sit up and take notice -
was learning that he used to be a KGB intelligence officer in East
Oh my gawd! I thought to myself. I've HEARD of Germany, too!
So here I sit, suddenly unable to decide between going out and
trying to find a Russian-language congratulations card at my local
... and paying a hypnotist to help me remember where I stashed all
those damn warheads....
It's just always something, isn't it?
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